Unfortunately, Objectifying Men is Not the Answer
I promise this is relevant but - is anyone else still thinking about the Bad Bunny and Jeremy Allen White Calvin Klein campaigns?
Jeremy Allen White for Calvin Klein (spring 2024)
Beyond appreciating them for obvious reasons, the most bitter part of myself found it vindicating to watch men reckon with the public objectification that women have dealt with for years.
I felt the same bitter, hollow victory when men expressed discomfort at Top Gun and Marvel movies for setting unrealistic body standards.
We know these body standards are unrealistic thanks to the honesty and good humour of public figures like Kumail Nanjiani and Rob McElhenney.
Yet, I still reflexively roll my eyes a little when reality stars like Miles Nazaire open up on social media to spread awareness about muscle dysmorphia.
Whilst Nazaire is not the most sympathetic character, I can certainly empathise with his message. I needed to get over my own defensiveness to admit:
The body positivity movement isn’t where we thought it was, and I’m part of the problem.
In the past week, I have had more conversations about Ariana Grande’s weight than her performance. I can’t imagine sharing my best work only to have people discuss how I looked in my dress.*
To those belittling her on social media: I promise you, if she is has an issue, there are people that know her personally - friends, family, doctors, her team - far better equipped to help her than strangers online begging her to ‘get help.’ You may think you’re doing good, but you’re not reaching her.
The people you are reaching are young people - both men and women - who are now learning the hideous lesson there is a ‘correct’ way to have a body, and doing it ‘wrong’ leads to public shaming.
No matter how talented you are or how hard you work, your body is the most salient thing.
We’re at such a pivotal moment. We finally have enough momentum in the conversation to move towards body neutrality. Some people (particularly celebrities) have the time and resources to manipulate their bodies into being extremely muscular. Some people are thin, some people are not. That’s OK.
Your body is not what matters. What matters is what you bring to the table: the art you contribute, the communities you create, the people you inspire.
As impressive as it is, Bad Bunny’s ad campaign shouldn’t overshadow the social movement that he’s leading.
*Actually, I can - but that’s another story for another day!